Patience

So many times I am impatient with my answer to "where I am right now?" I get so impatient with the menial tasks I have to do while at college each day. The classes I am taking to get my degree have become really uninteresting and not stimulating. They have become a means to end, and its frustrating.

I have such big ideas and plans, and all I want to do is get to them, skip the unimportant stuff, and make a difference.  Why do I have to take this stupid class, write this dumb essay, spend hundreds of hours in the library for what feels like nothing? Why can't I do these big things now?

I have been pondering these questions, frequently, every day this past semester. It is such a struggle to stay motivated and be on the same page as the master plan here. But I have been thinking, and have come to a conclusion about all this.

This time, though often seemingly menial and useless, is a blessing from God. Whether this time was originally apart of his plan or not, he has set it aside just for me. He has blessed me with some time, free of charge, in my life to just figure out myself. I haven't had appropriate time to find myself over the past years, and with recent problems and struggles coming my way, I need extra time to sort my issues out.

I need to recognize this and take advantage of it. How many times in your life do you get time to really find yourself, (for the most part) uninterrupted? Not often. I need to suck up the classes and menial tasks that I get tired of, and take it with a grain of salt. But in the mean time, I need to focus on figuring me out, garnishing the relationships I cherish, and prepare myself physically for the big plans I have for the future.

This is what I was thinking of lately, and today especially. Just because I have big plans and know what I want to do, doesn't mean that it has to happen right now. God sees my life in the big picture even when I can't because he is the Creator; how else can he see things? I need to remind myself that he has a masterplan, and I don't need to question it so often. I need patience.

Doing the things to prepare myself for the long haul will benefit not only me, but the people I so long to help.

Give me the patience to do the things I need to do, even if I do not want necessarily want to.