Temple

Last night, I went to mass, and one of the readings I took especially to heart. I don't always hear a reading that I think long and hard about, but this one was one of the occasions I actually did. The reading was from 1 Corinthians, chapter 6, verses 13-15, to be exact.

Brothers and sisters:
The body is not for immorality, but for the Lord,
and the Lord is for the body;
God raised the Lord and will also raise us by his power.

Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ?
But whoever is joined to the Lord becomes one Spirit with him.
Avoid immorality.
Every other sin a person commits is outside the body,
but the immoral person sins against his own body.
Do you not know that your body
is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you,
whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?
For you have been purchased at a price.
Therefore glorify God in your body.

At first hearing of this reading, I got stuck on the word immorality. I heard this word, and immediately was tempted to not pay attention, thinking this reading is nothing more than a reading about abstaining from sexual actions that are questionable at best. But, luckily, I continued to pay attention, and I am glad I did.

As I listened on, I thought of ways this reading applied to me, and realized this was a perfect reading for me; one that was exactly what I needed to hear. It gave me a new look and insight on my situation and recent past experiences.

One of the feeling I had felt about this situation was guilt. I had felt guilty and ashamed of how I had treated myself over the recent years. I felt unworthy of forgiveness for how I had treated myself, and not at peace with how to go about feeling okay with myself about it. Hearing this reading at mass really pinpointed something I had not really given much thought to. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? I guess I had always known this but always assumed this mean simply don't tattoo yourself or put yourself in dangerous situations. But this was one of those direct questions that I felt God was asking me through the speaker at mass. I heard this woman read, but I heard the words of God directing them straight to me. It was like, Nikko, do you realize your body is a member of me?

God had my full and undivided attention now, and I listened on. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you? This was a reiteration of the same question I was just asked a few lines before, but the temple analogy really hit it home. My value comes from things not of this world, but of God's, and of his gifts given to me. The connector between my valued, God-given gifts and personality is my human and Earthly body, and that I cannot do the good that God has made me to do without taking care of my Earthly body first.

Knowing who I am and hearing this reading made me realize I am doing what I need to do in spiritual nature, and have been all along. My struggles the past few years have humbled me and offered me a spiritual journey unlike one I could ever ask for. And though I still sometimes struggle to forgive myself, this reading really set me at ease and gave me some peace of mind on how I had treated myself over the past year or so. It has been a struggle, but I feel like hearing this and thinking of my body as a temple for the Holy Spirit within me, or maybe even as a vessel for the spiritual foundation I have discovered and built over the past year or so is really relieving and freeing. I feel free to continue to move on in the right direction, and continue to do everything I can and leave the rest to God's will.